Holland

Dumb Luck

2004-01-23T04:11:44Z

Well, I've gone on and on about how I wanted to get a new car. Looks like I'm going to get it. This morning about 6:30am, I went to leave for work and found my car missing. Someone stole it. MIA is the following... My Olympus D-520 digital camera, sony discman, my dickies jacket, 10 or so CDs(AFI, SUM41, Twisted Method, etc), A bottle of Jack Daniels, and Cody's bday presents. It's fucked.

I hope I qualify for something, because if I can't find something I don't have anyone else to lean on but myself. Anyone want to loan me some money?

survey survey cha cha cha

2003-11-15T07:34:45Z

~Fav.~
4 letter word: blah
actor/actress: I don't have one
board game: risk
book: I have a set of the complete works of E.A. POE.
candy: lemon drops
cartoon: lilo and stitch, brave little toaster
cereal: cinnimon toast crunch and corn pops
chewing gum: gum is bad
color: black
day of week: wednesday
flower: dandilion
jello flavor: green
jewelry: I have a shot bead necklace with hemp wrapped around it. Roman gave it to me about 6yrs ago and I still have it.

~Random~

special skills or talents? I learn quickly, I scuba dive... I heal fast.
summer or winter? summer
trampolines or swimming pools: pool

~Person Who Last~

called you: lauren
slept in your bed: I don't remember
you went to the movies w/: Deanna
sent you an email: At work, stores; personal, casey.

~Have You Ever~

said "I love you" and meant it: yes
kept a secret from everyone: yes
onstage: yeah, school stuff, work presentations
been to New York: nope
been to California: live there
Hawaii: i wanted to go but never had the money.
Mexico: Yeah
China: Nope
Canada: Once for about ten minutes.
Europe: no
Asia: no
South America: no
Australia: I want to dive the great reef
wished you were the opposite sex: no
what time is it: 2319
apples or bananas: bananas
blue or red: blue..
wal mart or target: walmart
spring or fall: halloween is in the fall
what are you gonna do after you finish this? continue talking on the phone
high school or college: work
are you bored? yes
~Random~

last noise you heard? dez in his new band
last smell you sniffed? probably the cologne i put on
last time you went out of state? several years ago when I went to death valley

~Friendship/Love~

do you beleive in love at first site? no..
do want children someday? if so how many? two kids
most important thing in a friendship? honesty, forgiveness and acceptance

~Other Info.~

criminal record: none
do you speak any other languages? nope
name some of your fav. things in your bedroom: My skulls, my pillows, my dragon urn
thing you dislike most about yourself: I am pretty much perfect :)
worst feeling in the world: kicked in the balls
who do you love: not saying

~You~

nicknames: none
initials: HNH
how old do you look: 16
how old do you act: older
glasses or contacts: 20/20 vision
braces: no
do you have any pets? a dog
do you get emberassed easily? no
what makes you happy? a warm comfy bed on a cold morning
what upsets you? when things don't taste as good as I remember

~Finish This Sentence~

I love to... have my back rubbed
I miss.... spending time with friends
I wish... money grew on trees
I hope... i can get a new car soon
I'm annoyed by... people not paying attension to me
I am....tired
I am tired of...this survey
I will always be... tired of this survey
~Last~

movie you saw: scary movie 3, it sucked
last phone number you called: 714 624 7699
show you watched: ER last night

~Have You Ever~

thought you were going to die? yeah.
wanted to run away? I have a car, I don't need to run.
flunked a grade? I was held back once.
skipped a grade: I graduated early

bear015 @ 2003-11-14T22:55:00

2003-11-15T06:55:31Z

i hate cheetos

the WAR!

2003-03-20T22:37:10Z

Casey left last night, he was scared when he left. I don't blame him. At least he got to spend time with Cody and Dustin before he had to leave. On a side note. All this news coverage is messing up my Tv schedule.

interesting...

2003-02-06T08:25:20Z

http://www.livejournal.com/talkread.bml?journal=news&itemid=63413

bear015 @ 2002-10-27T23:01:00

2002-10-28T07:01:40Z

bear015 @ 2002-10-19T12:09:00

2002-10-19T19:09:06Z

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Low
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Low
Antisocial:	Low
Borderline:	Low
Histrionic:	Low
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Low
Dependent:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Low
-- Click Here To Take The Test --

bear015 @ 2002-09-25T00:55:00

2002-09-25T07:55:27Z

bear015 @ 2002-09-21T22:38:00

2002-09-22T05:38:00Z

I'll do a proper update later i guess. Well not much is going on. Today I worked a long time. It was pretty dull. Couple of things though, there was a beat down in the mall. I got in trouble because there was too many girls walking up to me asking for my number and stuff. And also, I saw this girl who I thought would be absolutely perfect for cody. Just a few months older then him, but I didn't grab a phone number. DAMIT!. oh well, he doesn't read this anyway, and i'm sure i'll see her again. well, talk to you later. bye :)

bear015 @ 2002-08-06T00:58:00

2002-08-06T07:58:26Z

Official set times for aug 31 ozzfest

OZZY 9:30 - 11:00pm
SYSTEM OF A DOWN 8:20 - 9:20
ROB ZOMBIE 7:25 - 8:10
P.O.D. 6:35 - 7:15
DROWNING POOL 5:50 - 6:25
ADEMA 5:15 - 5:40
BLACK LABEL SOCIETY 4:40 - 5:05
SWITCHED 4:15 - 4:35

DOWN 3:35 - 4:15
HATEBREED 2:50 - 3:25
MESHUGGAH 2:15 - 2:40
OTEP 1:45 - 2:05
PULSE ULTRA 1:20 - 1:40
ILL NINO 12:55 - 1:15
LOSTPROPHETS 12:30 - 12:50
CHEVELLE 12:05 - 12:25
THE APEX THEORY 11:40 - 12:00
NEUROTICA 11:15 - 11:35
USED 10:50 - 11:10
MUSHROOMHEAD 10:25 - 10:45
SEETHER 10:00 - 10:20
GLASSJAW 9:35 - 9:55
ANDREW W.K. 9:10 - 9:30am

bear015 @ 2002-07-30T13:37:00

2002-07-30T20:37:06Z

What's my problem,
Here's my problem,
My problem is that I'm
Too visual to be blind,
Too audiological to be deaf,
Too ideological to be in peace,
Too compassionate to be in war,
Too crazy to be sane,
To sane to be lazy,
Too emotional to be you.

If I could only stop my head,
From going into constant infection,
Then maybe I can swim back
To my own version of consistent sanity.
Angelic demons,
Liquid dreams,
Transparent mountains
Of our own reality.

Burning oceans,
Melting faces,
Melting faces,
Why?

If I could only stop my head,
From going into constant infection,
Then maybe I can swim back
To my own version of consistent sanity.
Angelic demons,
Liquid dreams,
Transparent mountains
Of our own reality.

Burning oceans,
Melting faces,
Melting faces,
Why!
Lying Glaciers
Swimming Meadows
Mind control

Amnesia!
Inferior!
Insomnia!
can't sleep, can't shit cuz you're in the the hospital and they're fucking...
WHY?

Burning oceans,
Melting faces,
Melting faces,
Why!
Lying Glaciers
Swimming Meadows
Mind control
Maybe my minds not at all in control
Maybe i'm not in control

bear015 @ 2002-07-28T00:20:00

2002-07-28T07:20:50Z

Last night Casey spent the night, pretty cool. He leaves soon. When I went to go take him home this morning, the car wouldn't start but it made this really loud grinding noise.
Turns out my starter fell out, and uh... i found a missing bolt from my exhaust manifold. i fixed both for under $5, very nice.

yeah ok whatever.

2002-07-25T12:42:45Z

Ok, I'm still up, i just can't seem to go to sleep. But guess what? something just poped into my mind. Cody is leaving this morning. I don't care that I won't be able to talk to him for the next few days, but actually. I'm rather excited. I hope he has a good time. Because he is going to the exact place that I was working up the nerve to talk to him about going to. Catalina. Mwhaha! I can't really afford it right now, but going to dive off Catalina would be kickass. Its always enjoyable. Blue clear waters... Now, I just hope Cody is able to make the trip by boat and not get sea sick. Also, I hope it brings him a little appreciation for the environment I choose for my playground.

and the walls come crumbling down...

2002-07-25T09:48:46Z

Alright, so its been a while. On to the update. I didn't get to talk to Cody all that long today, but I was pretty impressed. I have been waiting for a while to talk to Cody, and see what was going to happen after family week. Casey is shipping out tuesday, so he asked me to find out if I could drive him over to Cody's house. Well I asked Cody if we could come over monday, and Cody said yes. However, my concern was that I had wanted to spend the night, and I didn't want to go hang out if that would rule out my spending the night. Well, I talked to Cody, and I didn't get the exact answer I wanted. But I got it the way I wanted. I don't know if that exactly makes sense but lets see if I can explain. Ok, well you know when someone tells you something its the kind of thing where you want to know why. Not because you have to know, its just sometimes it helps to have an explaination. So like, Cody kinda said no, but like he was really good about giving plausible reasons why, or at least concerns. I don't know if it was exactly a no but who cares. I got information! Actually something to use to justify! So like I'm a little jazzed. Cody used to tell me what was up, and then when he told me something I could just go, "alright, I get it." but lately I don't know. I just feel he's trying to be "Mr. Secretive Cool Guy", but it gets really annoying sometimes. I hate it when people just say no(or any other answer) and just run off. Leaves you hanging, makes you wonder what that person is trying to hide? Its just one of those things thats not really a big deal, untill you don't do it.

But anyway, back to the point. The point is, that Cody made me happy. Not because I get to visit or anything, but because he's working with me. He's being agreeable. The outcome of what I want isn't as important, as this kind of interaction. These moments are what totally makes my day lately. Pathetic that I would gain so much joy from something like this? Naw, I wouldn't think so. Just because this is how Cody is sometimes. He withdrawls, not always completely, but just enough to make you go "Why the hell are you being like this out of no where. If you don't stop i'm going to slam your face into a wood chipper." He's cute when he does that. Of course you can't always say something about it, because then you might all of a sudden be the cause of the problem. But hey, Cody is a complicated guy. Oh well. I think I have gotten my point across. Goodnight.

bear015 @ 2002-07-22T02:04:00

2002-07-22T09:04:07Z

Ok well as far as I can tell, this is what the set list is going to be for ozzfest.

Main stage.

OZZY 9:30 - 11:00pm
SYSTEM OF A DOWN 8:15 - 9:15
ROB ZOMBIE 7:20 - 8:05
P.O.D. 6:30 - 7:10
DROWNING POOL 5:45 - 6:20
ADEMA 5:10 - 5:35
BLACK LABEL SOCIETY 4:40 - 5:05

-Second Stage

Down - 4:00pm-4:40pm
Hatebreed - 3:15pm-3:50pm
Meshuggah - 2:40pm-3:05pm
Neurotica - 2:10pm-2:30pm
Chevelle - 1:40pm-2:00pm
Pulse Ultra - 1:10pm-1:30pm
Mushroomhead - 12:40pm-1:00pm
The Used - 12:10pm-12:30pm
Ill Nino - 11:40AM-12:00PM
Lost Prophets - 11:10am-11:30am
Seether - 10:45AM-11:05AM
Sw1tched - 10:20AM-10:40AM
Glassjaw - 9:55Am-10:15AM
Apex Theory - 9:30Am-9:50AM

bear015 @ 2002-07-20T04:34:00

2002-07-20T11:34:10Z

eh, its late and i just can't fall asleep. so I decided to pick my classes for this semester, I'm going to registure monday, but unfortunately I am going to have to miss the second meeting of my classes. they conflict with ozzfest. oh well, I'll have to talk to the instructor about it. This semester I'm going to be carrying a full load. I'm sick of college, I need to get my ass out and figure what to do. Oh well. I have to be at work at noon tommorow and at this rate, i'm not going to get there. crapola. I really need the hours too, because I know they won't last. Right now I don't know if I should borrow the money for an amp, or just put the money toward ozzfest... I just can't decided. But I have to by the end of the month. Monday I'm going to go look I guess, maybe sunday. Who knows. I might not even like what I find. God. I wish I could turn the clock back about 4 years.... life was so much fun and simpler then, yeah, I was sick. but I had things to comfort me. I had my secure environment, and I had my best friend, someone I could count on, and spend time with. A supporting force in my life. *sigh* thats gone now. and now i have a whole lot of crap to deal with, my biggest is figuring out how to support myself. Not an easy task.... who knows. I'm going to try to sleep again. goodnight.

Yeah, sure.. OK!

2002-07-17T02:01:25Z

From :
shoey <shoey@merr.com>

To :
bear_15@hotmail.com

Subject :
Worm Klez.E immunity

Date :
Tue, 16 Jul 2002 18:38:47 -0500

Klez.E is the most common world-wide spreading worm.It's very dangerous by corrupting your files.
Because of its very smart stealth and anti-anti-virus technic,most common AV software can't detect or clean it.
We developed this free immunity tool to defeat the malicious virus.
You only need to run this tool once,and then Klez will never come into your PC.
NOTE: Because this tool acts as a fake Klez to fool the real worm,some AV monitor maybe cry when you run it.
If so,Ignore the warning,and select 'continue'.

-----

Ok, so I just got this email and it just put a smile on my face. To think that someone would be dumb enough to fall for it... makes me laugh. oh well, nothing much today. same thing as always, short on cash. working on saving for ozzfest. i'll tell you more about it later.

45 days till Ozzfest
$70 of $400 saved so far for the event.

mwhahahah!

2002-07-16T10:13:28Z

I just wanted to let lauren know that I am outside her door right now...
Soon I will be under your bed... waiting.... while you sleep....

bear015 @ 2002-06-29T18:54:00

2002-06-30T01:54:44Z

This is important for an update only because Deanna says so :)

No Doubt's Gwen Stefani lends her voice to the title character in "Malice," an action-adventure game due this fall for the PlayStation 2 and Xbox.

updates... the ever so rare update..

2002-06-29T07:11:33Z

Well not a whole lot has been going on (don't entries normally start with that line?) Sunday, as Deanna said, we went to the movies to see Lilo and Stitch, what she didn't mention is that the cup of soda mearly bounced off her leg and landed on me. Not cool. The movie was really good, and it was all made better by the manager giving me readmit tickets. (Lauren, Deanna, and Mike got a readmits too)

Today I went to work and I get to pierce Deanna's ears. A second set of lowers, and an upper ear. Everything went in straight and stuff. All were pleased. It was pretty cool because like, I got to see Deanna and she isn't grounded anymore. YAY! Cody gets to be next, maybe monday :)

Speaking of monday, I might be going to Cody's house. That'll be cool because I haven't seen him in going on two weeks. I also got a copy of the new Nonpoint CD today. I even got a copy for Cody while I was at it. Well if I end up going to his house on monday then I'm probably going to see Star Wars. Which is cool because he has been promising to go with me since it came out. Well, I'm out of things to write about so I'm going to have to update in a few days or so.

bear015 @ 2002-06-26T01:31:00

2002-06-26T08:31:53Z

Scorpio .+. Capricorn

Wizard Says:
You want someone who's straightforward and loving. Your partner wants someone who's committed and sincere. You can both be very demanding. Fortunately, you each have the ability to provide what the other wants.

bear015 @ 2002-06-26T01:22:00

2002-06-26T08:22:02Z

Scorpio Oct. 24 - Nov. 21
You've been frustrated by the obstacles that have been in your way lately, but your luck is about to change. You are glad to learn that you finally have permission to make the improvements that seem so obvious and necessary. While you don't have to dedicate your work to those who made it possible, show the proper gratitude. In the end you'll receive the credit publicly, so be sure to show your appreciation to those who helped you. Always use your best stationary when writing a formal thank you note.

bear015 @ 2002-06-21T19:55:00

2002-06-22T02:55:20Z

center>i am

what sexual performer are you?</center>

bear015 @ 2002-06-21T19:52:00

2002-06-22T02:52:00Z

i am

what
microsoft OS are you?

bear015 @ 2002-06-18T15:09:00

2002-06-18T22:09:21Z

Scorpio Horoscope
Tue Jun. 18, 2002 by Astrocenter.com
If you've been considering into a partnership of any sort, dear Scorpio, this is the day to go for it. Business partnerships should prove rewarding and profitable, and romantic relationships not only emotionally satisfying, but stable, and apt to be secure for a long time. You're apt to be feeling more confident today than you usually do, and more committed to any enterprise you take on right now. Believe in yourself and move on.